Sometimes, it's all about the sisterhood.

Lately, I've been catching up on Girl Talk. Sunday night at a friend's house scarfing down Cali-style enchiladas over on East 83rd St and last night at my place cookin' up some veggie lasagna I discovered that this month is shaping up to be quite a doozie for a number of my girlfriends.

Resolutions like going to the gym every day can be harder to follow through on. And, it can be tempting to hibernate, cooking soul food and curling up with books and ceramic mugs of green tea.

This January, an unprecedented number of break-ups have occurred in my circle of friends. Four come to mind: three prompted by the man, one by the woman. In two of the cases, the men were in their early- to mid-thirties. In two cases, the men were younger than 25.

Two were right around the pivotal six-month relationship mark. One at the two-month mark. One at the 10-month mark -- a couple I felt sure would tie the knot in the near future.

A male friend sums it up by saying, "Yeah, V-day is coming and the guys just don't want to shell out for chocolate hearts and red roses."

How's that for romance?

A female friend say, "It's that time of year. New beginnings. Means old things have to end to make way for what's to come."

Go figure.

Here I was thinking about the cold and how it's this time of year when people want someone around to keep them warm in the blustering temps.

There have been disappointments to, as of late. One friend was so bummed out about law school grades (and I'm talkin' a B here) that she seriously contemplated dropping out mid-way through year two. (Yes, of course her amazing boyfriend and we girls talked her out of that ridiculous notion!) One friend didn't pass the CFA. One friend has topsy-turvy office politics brewing all around. One friend who works at a museum was glowing about an exciting new job offer only to have the rug pulled out from under her, another (yours truly ;) pitched a story to the Village Voice and never heard back.

Bummer. Yes. But, you know what? There have been successes to celebrate, as well. One friend, a Ms. Jessica Jones wrote a compelling cover story for the Village Voice (Read it here). A friend of mine from high school just got his first gig playing jazz at The Stone after playing for years in a Williamsburg loft for pennies. And, a roommate of a good friend of mine got a fantastic job at an NYC law firm after months and months of a taxing job search. Another friend is undertaking a bi-lingual start-up e-zine.

This is how it goes sometimes.

There will be wins, and there will be losses.

This month's failures are next month's successes, and oh, how much sweeter they will taste.

It's all about the resilience factor. Getting back on the horse. Taking the bad with the good. Glass half-full. Shaking it off. Being patient.

I mean, Hey! Who knew you would even go to law school? Or take that CFA? Or have so many stellar job offers? Or meet so many amazing and inspiring people? Or make it, Girls, survive and thrive, in this great Gotham adventure. This is what it's all about.

So, with that, here are a few things I've picked up lately.

On Disappointments:

They don't hit nearly as hard when you discover that they don't just happen to you and you alone. When you listen to others tell their tales or woe and then you see them persevere, you realize there's no cloud hanging over your head and rain doesn't just fall on you. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has had their share of disappointments. In a way, it can be an experience to share with someone that brings you closer. In a way, it can make you better, more real, more focused, hungry, stronger, smarter, and more beautiful from the inside out.

On Dating:

The biggest lesson I've learned lately, is that sometimes it's really great to be single ... especially in this city! Sure, you can get right out there after a break-up and find a placeholder. Or yep, you could settle for really, really, really liking someone but knowing you can never fall in love him or her. Or, you can get back to the other passions in your life. Create and complete a bunch of random projects. Spend time with your friends. Spend time on your hobbies and interests. Fill up from the inside.

My most recent superfluous project: Clearing out 2 age-old e-mail in-boxes. One dated back to grad school. One dated back to 2004 and had more than 3,000 e-mails in it -- just another form of bulky, needless clutter.

Finally, I set aside 3 hours and got rid of it. E-mails went into folders. Pages and pages of old emails were deleted. And, I rediscovered old friends. One of the best lost-and-found contacts were two Czech students I tutored in English while living in Prague. The families of these girls had invited me to country cottages and took me on trips to see castles and grandmother's flats for cake. It would be good to send them a card and say hello. That can be the next big project.

So, keep smiling, Sisters! Look how far you've come. You're doing great. And, I couldn't be more proud of all you shining stars out there. I expect big things to come from all of you.

How's that for Sisterhood?


Your Girl About Town